Our relationship with time and schedules might be quite different. It’s the 4th cultural shock issue mentioned by people visiting Argentina. You can check the other 3 in the previous entries.
We are not extremely attached to schedules, only if we absolutely have to, like in order to keep our job. Not to be on time is regular to us. If we are meeting friends at 7, it is expected that some will arrive at 7:30 or 8. We even arrange it that way: it’s pretty common to say “Lets meet around 7, 8” as if there wasn’t an entire hour in between. You can always hear someone on the bus, saying on the cellphone “yeah, I’m almost there” and then spending another 30 minutes on that bus. We appreciate punctuality, but it feels more like a present, a nice surprise. It triggers some kind of gratitude. We are about to say “you shouldn’t have bothered!”
If we are flexible about arrival time, wait to see how long it takes us to actually leave after already saying that we were leaving: we start kissing everybody goodbye, and starting conversations, and trying to arrange future meetings, and someone always has to tell us or show us something at that very moment when 40 minutes have already gone by, and then the host may keep us at the door for another 20 and end up realizing that we could take some left-overs with us, so we are back in the kitchen suddenly exchanging recipes for as long as it takes, ’cause at that point somebody else could be about to leave and why not wait to cross the door together even if it risks to start the whole cycle all over again.
I’ve noticed that many people from other cultures… guess what? Just leave. As simple as that. But not that simple to us. We might feel it as some kind of ghosting, you know? Or ask you for some explanation. Or even ask somebody else for some explanation: “Do you know why Johan left so abruptly? Yes, Johan, the whitest person on earth, that one, yeah. Was he tired? Feeling sick? Have we been talking in Spanish too much?”
Our average diner time is about 10pm. People can go to bed at 1am on a daily basis. Not me, I can eat at 7 and be in bed at 9. But you can’t imagine how absolutely weird is that. Even my mom makes fun of me.
Could you please let me know if you have heard of an equivalent to saying “Now later”? That’s our response to many requests: “ahora después”. One word immediately denying the other, just like that. I’ve shared it at my volunteering site:
It says a lot about our relation with time and schedules, and with each other, and towards unspoken rules, our ambivalence and our way of saying and not saying things.
Maybe time is on our side. Maybe we want to make believe it is. Maybe we are time’s relativity embodiment. See it yourself.
What is your relationship with time? How do you feel about it? Send me your thoughts and experiences firstname.lastname@example.org